by Christine Bevington
(Thetford Norfolk UK)
The Twilight Hours
It’s 3 am and you’re on my mind,
I just can’t sleep tonight,
I try but toss and turn and cry,
It’s not fair, or just or right!
I close my eyes whisper your name,
Into the dark still air,
My sweetest child my Angel,
This pain I cannot compare.
Missing you is such a huge part,
Of my life now of my day,
Every waking moment you’re there,
On my mind now to stay.
When I sleep you’re in my dreams,
Calling out so distant so small,
I feel you slipping away from me,
I just can’t get to you at all.
Then I wake up bathed in terror,
It’s like losing you all over again,
My heart racing the tears falling,
It hurts so very much then.
But sometimes when I dream of you,
I’m holding you in my embrace,
Breathing in every inch of you,
Gazing into your darling face.
This stays with me when I waken,
I carry it in my heart,
Watching you grow, seeing you change,
Even though we are apart.
Your name the trees whisper to me,
The wind it sings your tune,
I know you’re there, you’re with me,
As we gaze at the waning moon.
Hold my hand My Angel,
As we gaze into the nights wild,
These twilight hours are mine and yours,
My Angel, my darling my child.
Christine Bevington 2011
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by Christine Bevington
(Thetford Norfolk UK)
Forget Me Not
Forget me not sweet baby,
You are forever in my heart,
I hold you close in my memory,
While we are to be apart.
Forget me not my darling,
My love to you I send,
To wrap itself around you,
Where the rainbow’s colours end.
Forget me not cherished Angel,
For every night I say,
Sleep tight my little baby,
As on your cloud you lay.
Forget me not my child,
Never shall I forget your face,
Part of our family always,
No one could take your place.
Forget me not precious one,
My gorgeous little tot,
I love you so, cherish you,
I will forget you not.
Christine Bevington 2011
by Christine Bevington
(Thetford Norfolk UK)
A Broken Heart
When people said their heart was broken,
The words would seem so sad,
Yet I never understood, or deemed to see,
How hurt could be that bad.
In June my world turned upside down,
My Baby girl was born,
After 14 hours of fighting, left us,
Now my heart feels truly torn.
The days blend all together,
One month then two then four,
Now I can’t imagine feeling happy,
Or what I felt like before.
The pain is so unending,
The tears fall relentlessly so,
No one else could truly imagine,
The pain of letting her go.
So “heartbroken” now is different,
The word makes much more sense,
For life without my baby,
Who knew pain could be this intense.
I face each day with anguish,
Can I keep the tears at bay?
Can I pretend to the world that..
I really am ok?
Yet now I seem to wonder,
Do people really care?
When the tears fall down in Asda,
And people only stare.
To me she was my darling girl,
To others a story told,
If only I could tell them,
If I could be so bold.
Six months have nearly passed,
Seemingly making no dent,
Yet no one seems to notice,
Where the person I was…… went.
Christine Bevington 2010
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by Jamey Wysocki
(United States)
I am learning how to live
In a new way
Since that day
You were taken away.
I am learning how to live
With the things left unsaid
Knowing I got to say them
With every tear that I shed.
I am learning how to live
By embracing the pain
Knowing that you live on
Through the memories that remain.
I am learning how to live
Knowing I will never again see your face
And I have peace knowing
Your in a better place.
I am learning how to live
Knowing your in God's care
It gives me the strength to move on
And makes the pain much easier to bear.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Written In memory of my daughter Nicole
who died in a house fire at the age of 16.
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by Jill
(La Pine Oregon)
Beautiful brown eyes
Long curly auburn hair
Irresistible smile
Contagious laughter
This was my daughter
I miss her so.
Kind and loving
Best of friends
Loving Mother of two
This was my daughter
I miss her so.
My daughter
My friend
My everything
I miss you
I love you.
It’s been seven long years and seems like a lifetime.
Written for Amy Lenn Jeffers
Love Always, Mom
I wrote this for my Compassionate Friends chapter newsletter
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by beth ellen jack
(huntington beach CA.)
LIKE OPHELIA
For my daughter in the hospital
You came and went like a phantom image,
complexion pallid, more translucent than
waxy gardenias, petals spent and bruised.
You drift as greedy waters confiscated
what was left of you. How your wrists dangle
like broken stems, to fulfill a dire horoscope
most of us ignore, until we sense new perils--
blurs our vision. Even in California,
landscape once bright as tinfoil, can fold over,
as if the coppice outside bleeds, trees shake
like green petticoats, people bend like praying mantis
in the distance, dodging pellets of rain.
I no longer recognize patterns or designs;
what was familiar tilts like a fun-house mirror,
words make caterwauls, as if consonants and vowels
no longer exist. Still later, your hands remain folded
like Ophelia’s before someone arranges them,
almost like a benediction when the heroine sleeps,
until I bend over with a kiss.
*Beth Ellen Jack. @2010.
Published in Goose River Anthology (fall 2011)
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by Christine Bevington
(Thetford UK)
The Colours of Grief
How hard it is to fathom,
The sadness in the soul,
How that pain and heartache,
Leave us feeling less than whole,
If grief it were a colour,
It would like it to be known,
That there are so many facets,
Each emotion is a colour on its own.
Black would hold the terror,
Gold the love so true,
Red the fiery anger,
Missing you is blue.
Yellow when a memory,
Flies in to make you smile,
Green is for the calmness,
We feel once in a while,
Violet soothes the torment,
Orange the occasional laugh,
We allow ourselves so rarely,
Grief is not an easy path.
Then pink it draws you to me,
Your colour it is so,
Many colours to remind me,
The pain of letting go.
Then purple is the colour,
Of healing I’ve been told before,
So purple wrap around me,
My heart is truly sore.
So many colours I’ve discovered,
Make up the grievers soul,
So many emotions to encounter,
In an attempt to make us whole.
Christine Bevington 2011
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by Christine Bevington
(Thetford Norfolk UK)
Heavens Fields
I often wonder of heaven’s fields,
Are they as wonderful as they say?
Are there lots of games and toys?
For our babies to find and play.
Do the angels guard them well?
Keep them out of harms way,
Do they read our babes a bedtime story?
At the end of every day.
Do the girls have pretty ribbons?
For their shiny, silky hairs,
Do the boys have trains to sit on?
Coloured footballs to kick in pairs.
Are there birthday cake and candles?
On our Angels special days,
Do they get lots of presents to open,
Are they spoiled in many ways?
My Angel I close my eyes and dream,
You’re so happy where you are,
Running through heavens fields,
Climbing on every star.
I know I cannot hold you,
And kiss your darling tummy,
But know forever that I love you,
And am always, ever your Mummy xx
Christine Bevington 2011
by Patricia Hurse
(Benton Harbor, MI)
THE REUNITING
One day soon we'll meet again
Oh how I long and pray for the day
To be able to see your smiling face
And once again to hear you say.
That you loved and missed me
As I loved and missed you
That you too longed for the day
When we'll meet once again on God's Heavenly shore
And together, forever, we'll stay.
But, I imagine you've found a place
And you're happy, no reason for sorrow
A place where the days never end
And there's no worrying about tomorrow.
I imagine in my mind that one day very soon
I'll be caught up to meet you in the sky
Reunited forever, what a glorious day
Then we'll never have to say good-bye
But, until that day I'll hold on to you
With the memories you left in my heart
And I'll face each day with new courage
Knowing that one day we'll never have to part
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by Eileen Mccarrick
(united kingdom)
If i could hold you one more time
And feel your little hand in mine
To see again those eyes so bright
To tuck you up in bed tonight
To whisper in your little ear
Night night god bless mummys hear
missing you my precious child